You go a little farther than just the hyperactive bloom lighting sepia tone, you smoke. Bravo. Bravo.

You say that as though it's some place important people care about.

Nobody will, and nobody will want you to.

OMG! It's the ghost of cock past.

And yet more prayer beads.

Is this some sort of plot by the Vatican to make guys (and girls) who like naked guys think Catholicism is sexy?  Because I don't think it will work like they want it to work...

Well, at least this one had the good decency to buy the censored quadriplegic torso.  You know, in case family comes over and wonders why he still doesn't have a girlfriend.

FLIP. YOUR POLITICAL STATEMENTS. AROUND.

I can literally hear this one going "OHHH" or "BOOOYAH" or something equally ~awesome~ in my head.

Completely faceless and overly muscular angels are hot! (?)

The groggy eyes and beard says he just woke up, but the hair says it's actually a cleverly crafted image to make you think he just woke up.

Look out! It's the underpants bandito!

If you're thinking about my baby, it don't matter if your (hat is) Black or White.

Addendum by bourgtai: Frank's Kwik 'n Cheep Wedding Apparel called.  They wanted to thank you for being their first customers.

The sad truth is he lost the key a few months ago.

Yeah. The voting majority will totes listen to you if you have a fauxhawk and aviators.

Bonus for thinking to flip your photo before submitting, but your plaque is wrong.

Tried cutting our own hair again, didn't we?

You're already IN the Army, do you really need camouflage bloomers?

Stop, drop your deuce, then come back and try again.

You thought the anchor would distract us from the gold chain ON YOUR UNDERWEAR, didn't you?

How... why... would you do that to your hair?

NO, YOU'RE NOT.

And I will break that arm to prove it, if I have to.

I don't even know how to categorize that... sling.

Ridiculously appropriate time for this.

O RLY?! OMG nowai!

The return of LOLwut!

Seriously?! Are you even 18??

This is for the Rosary I'm about to go say.

Unless he's actually served, in which case nevermind.

It doesn't ring as true if your mirror says it to you.

...But I'm not too self-concious to TAKE the naked picture.

Your sculptor chose a really crappy face.

Oh. Will I? Will I please?

There's a nest on your head, btw.

...

AHHH! It's Chris Crocker's revenge for us not leaving Britney alone!

Not extraordinarily douchey, IMO

I just think it's amazing that he can keep the camera centered on himself when he's doing something that blinds him and takes the cooperation of both of his arms.  That takes skill, and probably some practice.  Okay, he's a little douchey.

It's a lucky wife to have a guy who posts his wiener on gay porn sites.

Not.

There's, um. There's a big disgusting band-aid hanging off your elbow, you know.

Dudes'll buy this. Srsly

Bonus points for the facial expression, no less.

Honest to God, I can't make sense of that word frontwards or backwards.

Oh.  Oh!  It's juicy.  His case says "juicy."

Yeah? Well, same to you, crumplybrow!

No, putting the vicious slashes right next to the twinkly stars totally doesn't send mixed signals.

Prince is on the phone, he says he won't sign your adoption papers.

I'm entirely lost as to what he's "booyah"ing, but whatever it is, he sure showed... it.

I've seen people in magazine smile and I'm pretty sure this is how they did it.

Sweet headphones. Sweeter stash.

We're adding some authors

Hi there, everyone.  You might note that this isn't a photograph of a douche, and that's because there's finally some fun news to share.  I've finally got a second author.  Please welcome JSBN to the douche-finding expedition!

360 douche

But I still can't read his armpits...

Second note: this is his bathroom. His!

.enilno sretah eht lla ot egassem a dnes ot detnaw I

Aww sheeit, I gots two iphones! I even got mah mahspace up in hrr!